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I don’t feel good. Feels like I want to break down in tears but I cannot find any explanation for that. Nobody hurts me and I’m not pissed off by any other. So why can this feeling exist and let me drown on it. There is slightly unpleasant sense in my soul and I want to heave it out. But I’m now struggling to transform it into words so as to chuck it away. Perhaps, every bit of it is because what had happen recently. Let me take a long sigh. Huuuuhhhh~

The faultless word to describe this few days is ‘boring’. I’ve done nothing unusual compare to the other days though I should have done something this week. Actually, Wednesday was a big day for me. I ought to go for my interview but alas it was cancelled. It is just because a trivial mistake done by the administrator of SPPS ums. Somehow, all the bachelors of education were disqualified to go and take their interview this week. The issue is all about the written date on the senate verification letter. It should be 24 June 2010 instead of 29 July 2010. It’s all in rush.

Back to several days before, I’ve done anything to ensure my preparation is perfect. I went to get verification for all documents needed for the interview. I went there twice, back and forth. I brought a new case to store my certificates. Later on I’ve conducted my tuition. During the night, I was quite tired but I’ve studied after drank a cup of coffee. I stay up late just to get ready for my interview. Also, a couple of days before, I was unable to online due to some problem with my broadband.

Tuesday, I’ve cancelled my tuition class just because I want to prepare well for my interview. Woke up at 7am and checking my FB. Damn. Just a day off and something big happen. Is this for real? I eager to find the answer. WTF? Annoying truth I have to bear. I’m bowled over. Then I said to myself, everything happen for a reason. Yes~ it works. I’m denying the truth that I’m disappointed. I didn’t do anything. Just carry on with my routine. I have much time for myself, plus tuition was cancelled.

Moment past and now I feel something is wrong. Suddenly I feel down. How long will I keep waiting? Staying home and unemployed. It doesn’t feel good to have this feeling. Yes. I’m tutoring some students but that wasn’t because I want to earn money. I do it just because the demand and to fill my time for this while. That’s all. “Time always seems long to the one who is waiting.” This is so true. Yesterday, I went to get a form to become temporary teacher. Till now, I haven’t filled it yet and I don’t even know when will I submit it. Maybe I will, LATER.